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We’ve had Thomas for about 6 weeks now and here’s the most recent pic:

Playing Portal 2 Together

Playing Portal 2 Together

This is one of my favorite pics of him and I think it’s the only one so far that shows my face. He does enjoy being a scarf kitten, and honestly I’m not gonna complain about it. It’s adorable and much more desirable than the alternative of him running around the house like a crackhead. He’s also getting bigger, though slowly. At the vet one month ago he was a little over 2 pounds. I’m hoping this Friday he’ll weigh in at about 3.

Also, he’s taken a shine to the iPad, well all my Apple products actually. He likes playing the Friskies fishing game.

This past week has been a bit intense for me when it comes to Thomas because he decided to eat my favorite bookmark. Because it had a tassel. He destroyed it and ripped it to shreds. I’m sure he was very happy with himself. Well there was a small ceramic penguin on the tassel, which I managed to save from the first kitty onslaught. But the next night, he got to the very top of the headboard shelves and found the penguin. Now since I can’t find it anywhere, I assume he ate it. I’ve been freaking out that he is going to die because it could be stuck inside him somewhere. It hasn’t come out either end as far as I can tell, and I still haven’t found it anywhere. I’m beginning to worry again. This is why I can’t have nice things…

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Fun with Science
I recently borrowed Portal 2 from Goat and have been having a lot of fun with it. I still have to play the original, but my computer is laggy as hell right now. Old age and all that. Irish played through the original Portal about a week ago and Thomas was having a good time with it too. He loves anything with motion, cuz well he’s a cat. But I’m glad he enjoys the technology around him with minimal chewing. Lots of soft pawing, which is unfortunate with touch screens, but minimal chewing at least.

Portal 2I’ve been enjoying the hell out of Portal 2 and I’m really glad Goat let me borrow it for awhile. I’m at around Chapter 5 right now I think. The snippets of comedy strewn throughout are fantastic and the story is great so far. Irish and I need to do Co-Op together soon. We played it with AngryGinger, but since half was on my profile and half was on Irish’s, neither one of us got the achievement for the completion.

Irish has been avoiding watching me play so that he doesn’t have to deal with spoilers, so I’ve been trying to play when he’s not home, which is rare so that’s why I haven’t gotten very far along yet. He’s still playing through his second run of Fallout: New Vegas though so there’s no telling when he’ll get to Portal 2. We had the same issue with the Fable games, but dealt with it somehow. Though I think I was unemployed for some of that time, which made it easier for me to play without him there. We’ll see.

Also, I may have to change the blog layout soon to a more photo-oriented one, since I’m posting more pictures. That’s one good thing about having a kitten, you always have plenty of pictures to share. And the infrequent cuddles are also awesome, while they last.

He’s getting bigger but he still looks so small sometimes:

Lap Nap

Lap Nap

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I’ve been talking to Spitfire a lot online in the mornings at work and today got pretty deep into the nitty gritty of relationships and our respective troubles with them. In respect to something we talked about today, I found this excerpt from Holly’s blog particularly insightful and applicable:

I guess what most of these guys are saying is “I’m not getting laid and I see that other people are, so those other people must have some super magical unfair advantage.” Well, sort of, but that advantage is a lot more common than you think, and has a lot less to do with “being a millionaire lawyer with perfect abs” and a lot more to do with “acting like women are people.” As long as women are The Challenge, The Enemy, The Gatekeeper, The Quarry, or any other fucked-up-all-to-hell metaphor, you’re going to keep having trouble with us.

If we’re people, well… no more and no less trouble than any other kind of people, is all I can promise you.

Hopefully he’ll read this. In fact, Spitfire, you really should read more of Holly’s blog. It’s quite awesome and full of sexy times and insight into the minds of the types of women who are actually worth your time. Aka not bitches, but cool geeky chicks. Who like sex. Wait, that’s redundant. Har.

I did, however, find the painful irony and unfortunate bits of me giving advice on relationships to Spitfire: I can’t seem to take my own advice. I can tell him all I want that he can do this or this and that it could help him with women, but I feel like it means almost nothing coming from someone who isn’t in the perfect relationship as it is. Sigh. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’m happy with Irish, happier than with any other boyfriends I’ve had, but I’m well aware that the situation could be improved.

Actually, I was working on dealing with some problems and trying to improve our relationship through good, old-fashioned communication, but right at the climax of our chat, AngryGinger arrived for video game playing. So there’s currently a big pause button on the conversation. Hoping it’ll resume when AG leaves tonight.

And it’s nothing against him, but he has the worst timing for these kinds of things. But it’s a bit my own fault, since I knew he was coming over tonight and just couldn’t get up the nerve to talk about things with Irish until the last minute. As per usual.

Well, they’re still playing Marvel vs Capcom 3, so I’m gonna sit here and read my smut.

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On Target

We went shooting for the first time last night and I forgot to take a picture of the aftermath before we put a new target over it, but here’s the result of the first 80 shots or so. I took the top target off this morning, so that’s why it’s kinda hard to tell where I shot. But it’s also fairly obliterated from so many bullets.

I started with a Sig P238 and its accuracy was totally crap. Yes, it was a rental gun, but still… The second gun I used was a Sig P229 Elite and was a bit better and had better sights on it. I loaded up my last clip of the night and put on the fresh target. Here’s the result:

The first round I fired hit within the center ring. I whooped and got very excited, then proceeded to not do as well for the rest of the clip, but oh well. Little victories are good for me. Irish even said I did really well.

Overall I felt that I did pretty well and I do want to go again. The personal impact was greater than I expected though, and I felt almost terrified for a while after. I’m not sure what that was about. I know I didn’t hurt anybody, but I think the idea that I could have and that it’d be so easy to do such damage to another person… it was kinda scary.

But I’m glad I did it and am looking forward to going again. Next time I’ll get something easier to fire, like the 380 Auto or even the 22. Gotta have variety, ya know.

I do find it amusing that we came home from the range and then played COD: MW2 the rest of the night, though.

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Daily Trivia

Today’s Trivia is easy. Got 10/10 without even trying.

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Gun Shopping

We went gun shopping with AngryGinger a few weeks ago and it has been cemented: if I buy a gun, I want a Sig Sauer Mosquito. Probably not the pink one anymore, but just the basic black. And I totally want a thigh holster for it like Jill Valentine from Resident Evil 5. Like this. Cuz next time I do that costume, I want it to be more authentic. And I’ve got a better blue shirt now since AngryGinger gave me this for Xmas. Even though it’s a men’s style, it still fits pretty well. So it’s cool.

And IrishBro gave Irish a tactical belt that I might be able to steal from him to use as well. A few weeks ago I looted a grenade holster pack from a friend as well as a bunch of Army BDUs and such. He was moving and just wanted to get rid of extra stuff. And I’m a geek for anything military so…. it worked. If Irish ever wears that stuff, so help me…. he’s gonna get jumped so hard. I really wish he still had his Marines stuff, cuz the Marines are the sexiest armed forces, in my opinion.

I’m gonna go fantasize about that for awhile now…. sigh…

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Immediate Fail

I find the irony and ridiculousness in the fact that mere hours after saying I’ll do shorter, more  focused posts, I write a 1000 word post that rambles. But it was for Grapple, so it’s worth it. And I feel like it really got some things off my chest that I’ve been stressing about and dealing with lately. But I know that even though I’m aware of the problem and essentially why I’m doing it, I won’t stop. Cuz that’d be giving up, which in my world is akin to failure.

I used to say, if you don’t try, you can’t fail. I no longer believe that. If you don’t try, you automatically fail, and I can’t stand that.

Now, when I can’t do something right, I keep pushing myself harder and harder until I can, or at least I hit my limit and find the sane (or slightly insane) place to stop. This has happened with:

  • DDR
  • Guitar Hero
  • weight lifting/gym stuff
  • Dance Central
  • God of War
  • lots of other video games, actually…

Usually, it’s a digital barrier for me, because that is something that is set by a programmer and is not going to get any easier unless I figure out how to do it right.

Also, I got 150 hits yesterday. Beating my previous high (29) 5 times over. Holy crap!

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We saw Season of the Witch this weekend with BoobsMcGee and friends. It was alright. Tons creepier than I thought it was gonna be, and not really all that good. Nicholas Cage was playing a different kind of role at least, which was refreshing. I hadn’t heard all that much about it and didn’t really know what to expect. And the previews before it were all movies that looked very ‘meh’ and I had never heard of either. Very much a B-Movie experience. And considering I paid for both Irish’s ticket and my own, it was even worse.

But after the movie, the guys invited us to Serafino’s the next day to watch the Ravens game. I was totally excited to go and that we got invited. They’d apparently been doing it all season, and just never sent us an invite. Well, I didn’t get one at least. Most of the time, they’ll send something to Irish and just assume he’ll tell me about it. Well that doesn’t happen. And no one seems to retain that information when I enlighten them to it. Oh well…

We did end up going to Serafino’s though, and it was pretty cool. They had $1 sliders but they tasted burnt. Someone else got a different batch later and they were fine, but I still didn’t like them. They had mozzarella cheese on them and it wasn’t nearly as good as it sounds. At least the 22oz draft Yuengling was good. And we walked out only spending $12 total. Granted, I had made a decent breakfast that morning at 11ish of cinnamon rolls, eggs, and bacon, so we weren’t all that hungry. And we only stayed til halftime. He was tired and had a Spirit of the Century game to get to by 4. And since his car’s in the shop right now, that meant either I had to drive his ass there, or he had to get picked up by someone also going to game. The latter happened, thankfully.

While he was gone, I played some Fable 3 and got some of the last achievements I need to complete the game. There’s a glitch with the Popularity Contest one. You have to get 20 friends, but the counter goes down over time, as you apparently lose friends. Why you don’t get it automatically when you become king or queen, I don’t know. That would make too much sense I guess. Sigh. But I did finally get the King Henry cheevo: Get married 6 times as royalty and kill 2 of them. There are still a bunch online that I need to get, but that’ll happen all at once. It doesn’t work to just have Irish login and join my game, it has to be someone connected through Live. Which means I either do them with a random person, the rare actual friend who has Fable 3, or rent a second copy to play on a borrowed xbox after moving the saved game to the borrowed hard drive. So much crap.

Anyway though, I played that awhile until Irish came home and made bratwurst for dinner, which were pretty good. But then insisted on playing Borderlands with Guardian until midnight or so. I tried to work on actual work to get a start on the project due at noon today, but I got a few more pages into it, and just had to give up. I was too tired. And frustrated with my computer being lame.

I went to bed around 11pm and his game was keeping me awake, but I still tried to sleep. Then I finally drift off and he comes to bed, waking me up again. Then this morning was really hard. I felt crappy in general and was actually quite frustrated that the weekend was gone already. Without any good reason though, I was quietly sobbing, not crying really, but shaking and there were involuntary eeps and squeaks coming from me.

I guess Irish noticed because he pulled me out of the fetal position I had wrapped myself into, and held me close to him. A few more sobs escaped my lips, but I definitely felt a lot better and comforted by his embrace. Granted, it led to other things, but that helped relieve the stress inside me too. And it got me moving so I could eventually get up and get ready for work. Not that I wanted to leave his side then, but at least it got my mopeyness out of the way for the time being. And that’s all I needed right then.

Sometimes he gives me just what I need. Whether it’s what I think I need or want isn’t always true, but the fact that he can do that even sometimes, is pretty awesome.

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I realize that I haven’t written anything for awhile and I feel just awful about that. I was doing so well, hitting 10,000 words in only 2 weeks. Ah, well… such is life. Everytime I try to commit to writing with any sort of frequency I end up failing at it. Many things have actually been happening in the past few weeks which is why I haven’t had time to write(or at least that’s what I’m telling myself).

16th Washed/waxed cars with Irish
This was really fun, even if I did take a lot longer to do it than he did. I learned the purpose of the Mr. Miyagi wax on/wax off thing. It hurt after awhile, but was so worth it. I took a bunch of pictures with my phone and posted them on Facebook because I was so proud. It was a very bonding experience with my car and with Chris.

18th Senior Exhibition

19th Went for a run around campus
19th Duclaw
20th Helped Irish upgrade his car intake

Moved back home
By now I’ve gotten most of my stuff setup for living at my parents, but I’ve made it very clear to my parents that I’m only going to actually be at their house for a day or two each week, while the rest of my time will be spent at Irish’s house. I’m slowly organizing everything and going through my backlog of stuff from my whole life. I’m trying to cut ties to material things and get rid of the things I don’t need, but it’s a lot harder than I thought it’d be. So many memories, so much attachment, and so much wasted money.

22nd Mini-Graduation party

23rd Pre-Graduation Dinner
We went to Longhorn steakhouse and Irish finally met my parents. The dinner seemed to go well enough. He was very chatty which surprised me. He made conversation with them very easily. Brother seemed to size him up a bit when shaking his hand, trying to gauge him. Seemed like he was comparing him to my previous boys and maybe seeing bits of himself reflected in Irish.

24th Phi Beta Kappa Inductions
Got there a bit later than intended because it took forever to get ready at Irish’s and then get to UMBC, all the while having to keep up the appearance that I had just walked over from my apartment.

24th Graduation
Was getting really stressed out for awhile and texted Irish while riding into Baltimore with my parents. He reminded me that it was almost over and to just relax. That helped a bit, but the real help and stress reducer was when I ran into Linguist and had a happy/jumping/girly/geeky thing together. We got some pictures together and then went inside. My spirits soared again when I saw Roguewhaler and the other Visual Arts people. The ceremony itself was long as hell, but I was very glad that I had actually done the PBK membership since Freeman mentioned it and we all stood up, getting extra recognition. After what felt like an eternity, it was the art department’s turn to file onto the stage to shake the big guy’s hand and have our pictures taken. After that, the rest of the ceremony is a complete blur and went really fast. When it was done, I tried to grab whoever I could for pictures, which I later uploaded to Facebook. I tried to set something up at the last minute to go out with buddies for food or drink, but it fell through. We did however, go to G&M Crab house, with me still wearing my cap, causing many people to ask about my graduation and eliciting many congratulations.

26th Modern Warfare 2 – Rrrranger Schoooool!!
28th Grades posted – 3 As and a B, woot!

Memorial Day weekend
30th Settlers of Catan playing
31st MetalChef’s place – basketball, water-pong, catchphrase, and zombies

1st kayaking with MetalChef on the river
1st Got the placeholder site up for Dale Corn
2nd-5th Tennessee

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When we got home yesterday, Irish loaded up Mortal Kombat vs DC Universe that we bought. He played thorough the entire story mode on DC and wouldn’t let me play. After fighting with Gunnie a bunch over the project, he offered me the controller to hit things, but he was playing as Joker and I didn’t want to use him. I went away again and ended up talking to Gunnie some more. Finally yelled at him too. By the time I came back, he was playing as Superman and didn’t want to give it up. He was finally on the boss fight and couldn’t get through it. That’s when he actually let me try. I beat him in 2 tries. It was awesome. Irish made excuses that the computer made it easier since he died so many times. I then felt compelled to post it on Twitter and Facebook. Hah.

He started the MK story mode even after I had said I wanted to play something else. I wanted to play some Halo, but he said he hates it. I don’t get that.

But now I’m apparently the girl I always hated. AngryGinger wanted to come over for some co-op and Irish showed me the text. I said exactly how I felt, which was a mistake. So he told AG that I want a quiet night, blaming me for it not happening and AG responded with *whipcrack*. My retort was “Since when do you do what I ask? And when do I even ask you to do anything?” The look on his face was indescribable, then I had the idiocy to say “If anything, you have ME whipped. It’s kinda ridiculous. I’m a disgrace to girls everywhere”. I tried to laugh it off, but it didn’t really work. Oh GOD why did I ever start being blunt and honest with him?! I’m so fucked.

I went back into the office and kept working and when I came back out he asked if I wanted to watch Castle. Maybe I can still salvage this night. I hope. I said, “Sure, lemme just finish what I’m working on.” He kinda scoffed at me and I’m not entirely sure why. I just brushed it off and went back to work, finishing up as I had said.

I came back out and waited for him to stop playing MK, all the while attempting to apologize for being a bitch and that I really don’t wanna be that girl. But no matter what I said, he still seemed put off by the whole thing. We were gonna watch Castle, but then saw that Pandora was on, which he said he always wanted to see, but that I wouldn’t because it’s horror. I asked what it was about, saying that we could try, but if I get too freaked out then I know better or next time. He seemed to be getting a bit exasperated with me at this point. So I tried to make him understand that if he wants to watch it, then that’s fine. I just might have worse night terrors than usual. The movie was good, a little creepy but not too much. I figured it was alright and I’d be fine, so it’s all good.

We went to bed and I took my shirt off to put on lotion, but didn’t take anything else off. I walked back into the bedroom and he was already stripped down and getting snuggled in for reading and sleep. I went to my side of the bed and got undressed the rest of the way. As I was taking off my pants, I bent over in what I was hoping was a slightly sexy way. Then I heard “Woo!” and just laughed to myself. “What’s woo, the book or me?” “You.” “Oh well I’m glad I’m ‘woo.’ You’re always woo.” I then began to rub and stroke him as I usually do when I’m trying to get him into the mood or at least trying to get him to know that I am. After awhile, he told me that he didn’t want to do it tonight and that he was still not feeling that great since he’s detoxing from the sleeping pills. So I just cuddled up behind him while he continued reading.

I started babbling on about things again and being girly, saying that he should just ignore the things I’d said at lunch, because I was being girly and that I blame the impending biology for the over-emotional and horniness. I ended up saying something about it being frustrating not knowing and he patted my hand, basically the cue to shush. We both turned over and began falling asleep, and I just said “I figure one of these days you’ll tell me and then I can stop agonizing over it” “What?” “I said I figure one of these days you’ll tell me how you feel.” “I’m tired.” “I mean about me, but I’m not asking for anything right now, it’s late.” It was very awkward and silent for awhile until I finally got into a comfortable position to go to sleep.

When I woke up this morning, I had actually slept through the night. He woke me up at some point with a terror, but it wasn’t that bad. For some reason though, I kept trying to call him Bryan or Brad, then my night vision finally realized it was Irish. When we were waking up, I started lightly rubbing and touching him again, hoping to stat something in the morning like what happened the previous morning. No such luck, but when he finally did start reading, I cuddled up to him. Then when he was done and about to get up, he kissed me on the forehead. It was adorable.

We got up and had meatball subs for lunch and he did some dishes, laundry, and cleaned the coffee table. Now he’s playing MK vs DC some more. I think we’re gonna wash our cars today, but I’m not sure. It’s why I didn’t get a shower yet, so I hope he realizes that. Oh wait… he’s a guy, so I have no idea. Sigh… Oh well. If we do wash cars, it’ll be neat. If not, I have to get a shower anyway to go to Gunnie’s at some point today.

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